I wanted to write about the scariest thing I could think of, but couldn't figure out how to make 'stuck in traffic with a fussy baby and no diapers while fleeing the zombie apocalypse' fit into the blog's craft theme.
So instead I went with UFOs.
"UFO" usually stands for "Unidentified Flying Object", and that can be scary, but I'm referring to "UnFinished Objects". Unfinished objects freak me out, with their memories of promise followed by frustration, the guilt if they're for someone else, and the fear that they'll forever be staring me in the face to remind me of my failures and inadequacies.
Some people might like have a lot of half-finished projects around the house, but I think I just made it pretty clear why I don't. I also have serious cast-onitis, so I skip through life like the new couple in the quiet village--merrily pretending that everything is going to be okay as long as I'm positive and working toward goals. All the while, ominous music is playing in the background and those projects are silently glaring at me like the hill folk steadily waiting for the time when my grisly doom comes to a head.
So today, I give you my UFOs of Horror and Despair:
This is a sweet toddler-sized sweater that I'm making for my daughter. It's a simple enough project, and I've done it once before. The only problem is that the pattern is no longer available online. I had written everything down in a notebook a week earlier, but that didn't stop all the blood from draining from my face the night I clicked on the pattern's page and found out it didn't exist anymore. All this sweater needs is a border at the bottom, and then I'll get to move on to my nightmare of knitting little sleeves with double-pointed needles. It will be quick and simple if I ever get around to finishing it.....but I have to get around to finishing it first. Worst of all, it probably won't even fit my teeny-tiny girl until next winter so I have almost no motivation to finish it. And yet I'd like to get those needles back and feel free to start some more projects.....
Yep, that's a headless elephant. It's chilling, I know. The pattern is clearly written, the yarn is excellent, and my crochet hook HAS GONE MISSING. And I would like to finish this by the weekend. I'm not one of those people who cringes at the idea of ripping everything out and starting all over, but I don't love it either. And yet, that's probably what I'm going to do so I can start over with another hook.
Oh look, it's a Wingspan shawl. These aren't complicated, which is why nearly every knitter with an Internet connection has made at least one in the past year. It's all short rows and garter stitches and colorful yarn and a Google images search is sure to blow your mind. It would be a mindless dream come true if it wasn't my fourth one in 3 months. My motivation to finish this is completely gone even though this is for me! And, once again, I'd like to finish this up because the weather's getting cooler and I'd like to use these needles for something else. Like knitting a border all the way around this project:
My garter stitch fatigue may be due to the fact that I'm making two garter stitch projects in tandem. I've gotten through the majority of this project, but I'm close enough to finishing the hood that I just don't want to stick with it. As much as I love Elizabeth Zimmerman's simple and beautiful design, I'm almost tempted to tackle some project like cables in lace stitches (is that even possible?) right in the middle of this little jacket.
I'm sure that won't look weird at all.
I realize a few projects in my favorite hobby aren't quite as scary as pod people or a pandemic of flesh-eating viruses or being trapped in a car with a fussy baby while stuck in traffic as I try to flee a zombie apocalypse. And yet these projects are hovering above my head like menacing specters. They stop me from starting new projects and keep me from enjoying the thrill of trying more complicated techniques. They're big bad bogeymen that I can banish if I just get back to work on them--which I hope to do right after I post this.
I hope you're having a safe and happy Halloween this year! Feel free to tell me what scares you when it comes to crafting.